On my way out to a family event, I get called away as this is the life of a Doula. I rush back home and grab my doula bag and head over to my clients house where she is laboring.
I walk in to there house, it is dim, and calm, and I find her in her bathroom in her big soaking tub, nervous as can be trying to stay calm. I immediately sit beside her and hold her hand and say I am here and the four of us will get through this together. (Mom and dad to be, baby, and I )
We chatted a bit on how she was feeling, and she quickly started to relax more allowing her body to go through what it need to, to help birth this baby.
Her husband and I encouraged her to eat some soup, and to drink some water, to help keep her body strong, and nourished through out this beautiful transition into becoming a mommy.
About 10 minutes after she ate, it all came back up, and because she was in the comfort in her own home she didn't even care. Her husband and I got her out of the tub and straight into the shower that was in the same bathroom. As her husband and I cleaned out the tub she was taking to her baby in the shower to help her stay calm. " Its OK baby, we can do this, they are almost done cleaning the tub and we can go back in, lets work together" It was truly amazing how well she was doing and watching her bond with her baby before he/she arrived.
Once the tub was cleaned we filled it back up and she got right back in there and continued to talk to her baby. I was actually jealous at this point as I wished I had known about laboring at home with my own babies, because if I did, I would want it to be the way she was doing at this moment. So calm and in love with her birth and baby, it was so beautiful to be part of it.
After a few hours of laboring in the tub and continuous talking to her baby, as her husband kept her calm with getting her water, and giving her homeopathic remedies I knew it was time to call the midwife, as she was showing signs of active labor for more then an hour.
The midwife came into the house so quietly and came up to the bathroom where we were and without turning on the bright lights we all talked about what was going on and from that point the midwife checked her and gave her news that yep she is in active labor and now it was up to her, if she wanted to continue to labor at home or start making the way to the hospital.
This beautiful laboring mom was coping so well with her labor, that she was scared to have to do the 40 minute drive to the hospital. The midwife and I told her she could just stay home and have her baby, and she wanted to but dad was unsure of the idea, so for everyone's peace of mind she agreed to go to the hospital. I told her at this point to keep talking to your baby while in the car, this is working for you and your baby, your working together, and that is what you need to get you through this drive.
Once we were at the hospital, we got the Jacuzzi ready for her and got her back in the water, and we tried to recreate the same atmosphere that she had at home, with a quiet calm room with the lights dimmed.
At this point I could not believe what I was seeing, a laboring mother talking with her baby and how they both were listening to each other, and working so well together, with no medical interventions at this point, no IVs, no pain meds, no continuous monitoring and not one ounce of fear in this mom to be.
She was a woman who loved to labor in the water with calm voices and a zen atmosphere, she found her birthing ritual which was talking to her baby with no one touching her while she was having a big hug from her uterus. (contraction)
It was about three hours later that the midwife want to check her progress, and at this time this we found out that her progress was a little on the slow side and the baby was nice and low, and the bag of waters was bulging, so the midwife talked about breaking the waters, the benefits and the side effects of this procedure. At this point the baby was happy, mom was coping well, so their thought was if they break her waters it will most likely move her labor faster so she can meet this bundle of joy sooner. After some discussion with her husband they decided to let the midwife break her waters on one condition that she gets to go back into the water.
The Midwife broke her waters at 12:12am, and by 12:25 she was back in the Jacuzzi back in her zen mode. I was still stunned how well she and her baby were working together and how calm she was and how she was so filled with love with this whole birthing experience, it was the most amazing feeling in that room. I can not even explain it in words.
After a short while, maybe a half hour after her waters was broke she looked up at me with a vulnerable look on her face and said to me in a very quite voice, Malissa I don't know if I can do this anymore, I just want him out now. I took her hand and looked into her eyes, and quietly whispered to her, you can do this honey and guess what you are doing it, your a birthing your baby so beautifully and so calmly it is an honor to be her with you, now I know your tired so rest in between and keep talking to your baby and work together, you are doing a wonderful job.
Her husband was such a good support person, he would bring her drinks, and would make sure she would nibble on a arrowroot cookie to make sure her sugar levels would not drop, he would also reminded her to sip her water as he would stroke her hair away from her face. He respect her space and backed off when she was having a contraction. He was not afraid to show affection to her when she needed it, with a hug, or a gentle kiss. These two people were so in sink with each other it was a rare thing to see. Both so calm and working well and knowing what each one wanted with out words.
It was around 1:20 when the midwife and I noticed her movements changed and her moans changed, they went from a smooth movement and sound, to a more intense baring down movement and sound, so the midwife checked her and sure enough this laboring woman was fully dilated and ready to birth this baby.
We got her to her feet, and as we stepped out of the tub she tells her baby, just to hold one for a few more minutes mom, has to get to the bed before you come and see me, and sure enough, she had a little surge of energy to make her way to her room, and up on to the bed.
This mamma did an amazing job at working this baby out, she listened to her body and her baby, and after only an hour an a little bit she had a beautiful baby boy.
Mom and baby had skin to skin right after birth and tears were flowing from dad and mom, and yep of course from the Doula as well.
Mom was breastfeeding and baby took to the breast without any issue what so ever, she was calm and just so relaxed and just talked with her baby, they were working together through this whole process with no interference from anyone, just mom and baby.
This birth was so remarkable, how a mom took control of her birth, and trusted her body, listened to her body and her baby to get through such a journey together.
Her birthing team was awesome too, Thank you to the dad for doing such a great job in supporting her, and thank you to the midwife who stood by her wishes for an un-medicated birth.
I hope many women will read this birth story and find in there self's the confidence to birth there babies with out fear, and to know you just need to relax, breath and talk to your baby, and that they are all strong no matter how they birth their babies, as it takes a strong person to house a baby for nine months, and to birth a baby and to be a mom :)
Thank you for reading.